I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize