well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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