it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Randomize
