so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize
