I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
