I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
