atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize
