So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
