Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Randomize
