youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Randomize
