We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I would fuck him just for his dog
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Randomize
