Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
It's shark week go big or go home
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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