Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
The feeling are messing with the penis
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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