Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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