I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Randomize
