I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
