three words: i give head
three words: not that well
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Randomize