Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
