Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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