I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
