im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Randomize
