theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
