yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
God, you're like boner-b-gone
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
