billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
