We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
porn star boner night. come get it.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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