yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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