we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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