your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
