just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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