Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
