wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
