mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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