i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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