I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Randomize
