Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
