omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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