Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize
