You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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