um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
