HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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