he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize