I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Randomize
