This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
