Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize