I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
