So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Randomize
