I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
