I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
