it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
