well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Randomize
