You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Randomize