Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
